Bush Has Won the War! Iraq Is Free!
April 02, 2004 | 11 Safar 1425
I am glad to announce the glorious victory of the Bush Administration. The Commander in Chief along with Rumsfeld, Colon and the ever compassionate Dick Cheney, have finally won the war on terror. Bin Laden has joined a Buddhist monastery and will spend the rest of his life in repentance by being a gardner. Quote, “I have brought so much pain and suffering that I will now give back to those that I have taken so much from.” In a wave of joy, President Bush has called home the troops. John Coltrane was heard playing in the streets of Baghdad as the Iraqi people celebrate their liberation at the hands of, “Our American Heroes!!” What? Wait a damned minute. Oh, yeah, today’s the 1st of April. Sorry. Ignore all that.
